The Tale of Mr B.Russel Sprout

The following is an excerpt from Kitchen Scraps: a Humorous Illustrated Cookbook

Once upon a time there was a gentleman named Mr. B. Russell Sprout who lived in a red-brick townhouse on a cobblestone lane near the bank where he worked. Even the other bankers thought Mr. Sprout was an old fuddy-duddy because he always wore the same limp-green tweed suit and bowler hat everyday.

Nobody ever invited him round for dinner fearing he would be a dreadful bore.

One day after work, Mr. Sprout joined his colleagues for a pint at the pub.

A few pints later, he had taken off his stuffy old suit (along with everything else) and was running around town making a spectacular spectacle of himself. He definitely knew how to party. After that night, Mr. Sprout was invited ’round for dinner all over town, and everyone was happy to see him . . . especially after they got a little booze in him.

Brussels Meets Brandy

10 Brussels sprouts, halved

pinch of salt

2 Tbsp butter, divided

1 oz shot (2 Tbsp) brandy

1 orange, zested and juiced

1 shallot, minced

sprig of fresh thyme (leaves only)

1/4 cup dried cranberries

PROCEDURE

Place the Brussels sprout halves flat side down in a frying pan. Cover halfway up with cold water, and add a pinch of salt and 1 Tbsp of butter. Place the pan on high heat, and cook at a rip-roaring boil until almost all the water has evaporated.

To flambé the sprouts without lighting yourself on fire, carefully remove the pan from the heat, add the shot of brandy, and using a long match or a barbecue lighter, light the booze on fire and place the pan back on the heat. When the fire subsides add the orange juice, orange zest, shallots, thyme leaves, dried cranberries, and the last bit of butter all at the same time. Toss and cook for a couple more minutes until the sauce gets syrupy and glossy.

Realistically you should make a whole bunch of these because you will be serving way more Sprouts than usual. Make everyone try at least one. It will make them change their minds about Brussels sprouts.